Choose Wisely

 I've always had a difficult time making decisions.  I think it's because, from a very young age, I had the uncanny ability to see the ripple effect of my or someone else's actions: if I do this, Mommy will be sad/angry/happy and then...if that boy hurts the kitty, I will feel the pain and the world will have become a cruel place.  I think it's the result of an anxious but also empathic mind, having this micro to the macro view; being able to see all the possibilities of any given situation and not knowing what to do with that information can be a little frightening.

If you think about it though, even the simplest day to day decisions are, actually significant. What we decide to eat for breakfast or the color of the shirt we choose to wear can have an impact on our mood and productivity which in turn, can affect the mood of those in our realm of influence. Other, larger decisions, such as who to vote for or whether to commit to a certain cause or area of service, require some inner reflection and weighing of options, as these will certainly impact the lives of others.

Big, life-changing decisions can be the scariest...whether to move or change jobs, go to this college or that, or marry a certain person, can be life altering. When I decided to transfer to a different college after my first year, the result was that I met my husband, was married and had a child within two years. 
That one decision changed the course of my life entirely. Heavy stuff.

I've always tried to make big decisions prayerfully, seeking the inner guidance of the Spirit, which I think is very important.  I've relied on my heart, which some religious leaders say is not wise, but in my opinion, being ruled by doctrine or legalism and ignoring our hearts, is foolish.

I once had a wise spiritual leader say that, if we are prayerfully seeking the answer to an important decision, to consider open and closed doors.  If a door closes, we must decide to go another way and, though we may not see it right away, if we are patient, a new door will open and we will be guided.

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks,

the door will be opened.       Matthew 7: 7-8