Mom in My Heart

Mother's Day can be a mixed bag of emotions for those of us who've lost our moms. It is so true that Mom holds a special place in our hearts forever, whether she is here on earth or has passed on to that other realm. Yet no matter how strong our faith is, the afterlife still
remains a mystery. 

Yesterday, my Mother's Day was spent eating a delicious brunch at my daughter's place, hiking with my family and enjoying flowers and sunshine in the garden. I am very thankful for all of those moments, yet my heart was still filled with an intense longing for my mother's presence. Even now, 7 1/2 years after her passing, it only takes a fleeting memory (the way she loved to whistle in the morning), to send me into tears. I suddenly experienced a rush of missing her physical presence--the warmth of her hug, the smell of her perfume, the sound of her voice.  I realized with clarity that this intense longing for a person's physical presence, is the part of grief that never goes away.  It fades with time, of course, and we can distract ourselves with the busyness of life, but the fact remains, that special person is not in this world anymore and
never will be again. 

So we go on, holding our loved ones in our hearts, treasuring those memories and accepting that the sadness of grief can well up unexpectedly at any moment. We can assure ourselves with faith in the afterlife, but no matter how strong our belief, we are left in a world where they are not.

I hope this is not too depressing a subject to leave you with today, on this beautiful, sunny May morning.  I know that I am not alone in feeling this way, and that most people have lost someone dear to them.  It is part of "the circle of life"....birth, experience, death and rebirth as something else (the mystery remains). 

It is fleeting, all of it, so let's be thankful for today and keep that special person alive in our hearts, while trusting
that Spirit never dies.